I'm gonna party like I like to party

And it's called I've got a loaf of bread, a slab of brie straight from la France, a Granny Smith apple, and the last Cadbury Whole Nut chocolate bar. Hit it.

I needed this party, because I trudged about 3.5 miles today, carrying all kinds of bags in the gloomy mizzling weather. And for those of you who ran 3.5 or more miles today uphill in the snow or whatever and are wont to congratulate yourselves, just shut up. I don't have to hear it from you.

Good thing that happened today: I got to shush someone. In the library. Much like a librarian would do.

It was awesome.

The library has 4 floors. The top floor is my department, the 3rd floor is kind of the free-for-all floor w/the periodicals and the computers and copiers, and it's where people can talk and use cell phones and mill about and stuff. The 1st and 2nd floor are designated as being quiet floors. In fact, Floor 2 is quiet and Floor 1 is silent, which is a funny idea. Do people have to hold up signs when they want to ask for stuff?

Anyway, I was doing some of my first bits of research on Floor 2 (the quiet floor), when I realized that I'd been hearing the same girl's voice for quite a while, and that hers was the only one I was hearing. My first thought was, "Oh, no she is not." I peered over my little carrel and saw that she was jabbering away on a cell phone. And it wasn't one of those, "Sorry, can't talk, in the library, call you back" conversations. It was some long drawn-out affair about how some friend of theirs isn't being very nice right now, punctuated by nods and "Yeah, oi knoyw" and "Riiigh', that's no' on." I gave her 8 seconds, then went on over, smiling very nicely, and asked her to please keep it down.

Lucky for me, she smiled shamefacedly and apologized, then ended the call quickly. It could have gone much worse for me if she'd turned out to be some huge beefy rugby player (we have them) who took exception to my remarks. I doubt the skinny little engineering boys in the surrounding carrels would've been much help to me then. And if we were on the silent floor I probably wouldn't even be allowed to scream for help.

Stay tuned for tomorrow's exciting stories:

1. The dead sexy dress that cost me 4 pounds!
2. Why I'm not going to bother exercising this year!
3. Report on tomorrow's Gender and Information Studies class, where I will learn to be a full-fledged Feminist Goddess of Doom! Others may join me. We will have a full health plan.


Cicada said... [reply]

Ooo, I'm so proud that you did the whole confrontation thing. It usually takes me way more than eight seconds to work up the nerve. Also, I would feel ashamed to tell a Brit what to do in my American/Canadian accent, because I think that the terrible accent lends me no credibility. I'd be afraid that as soon as I opened my mouth, several other Brit heads would pop up in unison to shush me!

Nemesis said... [reply]

Those thoughts did cross my mind, actually. But then I thought that maybe a Brit would feel even more ashamed to be reminded of basic good manners by some Yank.

edgy killer bunny said... [reply]

Congratulations on your first British Shush. I think you should celebrate. And you should celebrate with lots of chocolate; one itty bitty little ole Cadbury bar simply will not do.

JB said... [reply]

Well done! PS I wanna join the feminist club, sign me up!

daltongirl said... [reply]

Yes to everything Cicada said. Actually, while I was reading I was wondering whether or not you put on a fake accent when you said it, just to lend yourself credibility. It's sad that we feel inferior, isn't it? Need to listen to Elder Holland's talk again already . . .

daltongirl said... [reply]

Oh, and your pixie looks very cold and wet. Why doesn't she put her umbrella up? Is this some passive-agressive way of getting back at you for telling her to cover her tummy? Well, if she should die of a cold, it will be of great comfort to me to know it was all in pursuit of . . . I'm not really sure what.

Anonymous said... [reply]

That's about the extent of my kind of partying, too.
And I'm always to chicken to shush people. Once at the movies, two girls behind me talked (loudly) the entire time, and I never said a word. Until they were halfway out the door.

kristen said... [reply]

Don't worry--I can't out-do the 3.5 mile thing. If I ran .5 of a mile I'd fall over and collapse. And 3.5 miles of walking? Only on a treadmill, with handles and a bottle of water. Just think how much exercise you're getting! Who needs to join a gym?

You're my hero for shushing someone. That will be the best part of your job in a library. You could set a record for the most shushes in an 8-hour workday. Something to shoot for........

Stupidramblings said... [reply]

Once while I was at a concert. Some bubblegum-chewing teen girls were chattering away and making signs to hold up for thier favorite band members. I asked them to be quiet--which they did--and they proceded to make their signs.

Then it started. Apparently, the words on the signs needed to be colored too, because as I was enjoying one of the most beautiful renditions of a non-denominational choral hymn that I have ever heard, they started coloring with black magic marker.

EEE-eee. EEE-eee. EEE-eee etc.

I didn't just give them a polite British shooshing, nor did i give them a slightly ruder American shooshing, I gave them the full German spine-tingling kind of shooshing.

It was very gratifying.

CoolMom said... [reply]

Everything German is accompanied with spit. Just so you know.

Kelly said... [reply]

That food sounds amazing! Brie and apples rock.

Your "Hit It" immediately put me in mind of the alternating shrieks of MC Rob Base and DJ EZ Rock's classic "It Takes Two." I think I need to listen to that on my iPod today.

Kelly said... [reply]

Oh and I'd like to join the Feminist Goddess of Doom team. I am imminently qualified and I need health insurance.

Mary said... [reply]

Will the FGD have bylaws? I think it's important to have bylaws.

Nemesis said... [reply]

For those who've expressed an interest, the FGD will most definitely have bylaws. I think a feminist coven is nothing without bylaws.

There will also be regular meetings (possibly by conference call) with large quantities of chocolate, cheese, and poisonous wit.

Coop said... [reply]

How do you pronounce "Ssshhh!" with a British accent, I wonder?

amyjane said... [reply]

So, in the interest of not being out of the loop, I finally created a blogger identity and the beginnings of a blog...it's not much now but maybe I can work with it during my fun maternity leave. I know, I know. You should be proud, nemesis. Look at the crap you get me sucked into.

Nemesis said... [reply]

Amyjane, dearest, I'm so glad you're here! Way to bring it, baby.

kit said... [reply]

Nice party...it sounds so yummy. In the meantime, I have chili for lunch. Dead sexy dress...are you also going to post a picture...where did you find it? Well, your British boy should be coming out of the wood work soon.

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