One serving of smallpox, please
Scene: Cuddling on my couch, late of an evening last week. WR is ill, but is still looking quite attractive to me. Am trying to weigh the risks, which seem less the later it gets.
Me: So . . . you would be contagious then.
WR: Yeah, but I asked my doctor how long I'd been contagious and he says it would have been for 3 days before I started showing symptoms.
Me: You actually asked your doctor?
WR: Oh yeah. So you probably already have it.
Me: I bet I don't. I don't feel sick.
WR: Well, if that's true, and if you don't become ill, then that means that you gave it to me.
Me: Excuse me? How do you figure that?
WR: Because . . . that means that it's some American disease.
Me: But I'm not sick! How could I possibly have given it to you?
WR: People can carry viruses and be immune to them. You're probably a carrier.
Me: I'm not a carrier!
WR: You could be. Why else wouldn't you be sick already?
Me: What, like I'm the settlers of Jamestown and you're the helpless Native Americans about to be wiped out by smallpox?
WR: Basically, yes. I didn't stand a chance.
Me: Well, tempting as it is, getting a viral infection of the upper respiratory tract wouldn't actually be fun.
[pause]
Me: Okay, getting it could be fun, but having it, not so much.
WR: It's just the upper tract, though. It's not, like, the whole thing.
Me: Ah. Good point.
End Scene
(Editor's Addendum: Some extensive field work has proven that I am, for all intents and purposes, quite immune to this disease. Take that, England!)
I'm Steph, a librarian and mom of 3 (not sure how that happened). Let's chat books, food, Sumptuous Literary Adaptations, poop, knitting and maybe some crazy Mormon Feminism.
11 comments:
Okay...Miss Nemesis, you are quite the little screen writer. I haven't laughed that hard in a really long time (not about the sickness, but about your health logic of course). Glad that you are immune...still it's good to be careful. But, who am I kidding, have fun doing more field research! :)
It's amazing the sacrifices we'll make on a cold, lonely, evening in the English countryside . . .
I want smallpox!!! If, indeed, I could catch it through snuggles and smooches...I mean, really, I need to build up my immune system...
Jamz, you flatter me so. I figure that you'd love the medical rationale, what with being a nurse and all. ;-)
It's true, Limon. Sacrifices are rough, but somebody has to make them.
You totally need to build up your immune system, Redlaw! And what could be a better time than when you're in Paris and London getting exposed to all the foreign germs, huh??
Yeah, only I didn't get sick, my sister. This goes back to my Immune System of STEEL. But on the mono thing, I guess you and I will have to be carrier monkeys together. Sorry, WR and SavvyD.
Why stop at smallpox?
Why not just go out and contract Anthrax?
Your immune system obviously needs a good test...
Oh and, YAY for mandatory childhood immunizations.
Snogging the sickly, eh? Have you no shame? :)
Oh, to be young and sick and infatuated.
I probably would have kissed him too. Kissing is just that tough to give up! I don't think I ever got any British illnesses either. Maybe we're just stronger (and/or sicker) than those Brits!
I cannot tell you how miffed I am now. I've been sick for SIX WEEKS, and I didn't even get the dang kiss to cause it!!! Travesty!
Stupid, I too am a fan of immunizations. I hope they do those here in England . . .
April, when the canteen is as empty as mine as been for this past forever, then yes, I have no shame. ;-)
Darn straight, JB!
Oh my gosh, Chosha! Are you feeling any better yet?
*cough, cough*
Getting there.
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