Wherein I begin the path to recovery

So, lest there be a few people in the backwoods of Nepal who haven't heard yet, I'm sick.

Only now I'm going to be getting better, on account of my aforementioned BFF, even Dr. N of the Student Health Clinic.

I went to see him on Monday at the urging of my family, my friends, and my own wish to find out if I have a chance at life or if I should start asking sweet sweet death to just get it over with and take me.

I waited for exactly 2 seconds in the waiting area, reading the many posters about meningitis and safe sex that they have up on the walls, and a beautifully Asian-accented male voice called my name. And thus it began. He invited me to sit down and tell him about my symptoms and everything, which I was happy to do.

Dr N: "So does your face hurt right now?"

Me: "Yeah, kinda, but I'm on, like, tons of drugs, so . . . "

DN: (presses his fingers on my forehead) "Does this hurt?"

Me: "Yep." (Partly because you're pressing against a zit, but hey, whatever. Pain is pain. Give me the drugs now.)

DN: "So you are congested. And is there discharge at all from your nose?"

Me: "OOOHHHH Yeah. Lots of it." (I didn't tell him the part where I think I've moved past my sinuses and am now expelling actual pieces of brain.)

We did Q&A for a bit longer, and then he agreed with me that I have an infection, and told me to take Amoxicillin and do the Vicks Vapo-Rub steam thing and take whatever pain-killers I want (heee . . . ).

So then he was tapping the notes into my file.

DN: "Now, you're on the Pill."

Me: "Uh huh."

DN: "This interferes, so for two weeks you need to use a condom instead or tell him to keep away from you."

Me: (in my head): "Hmnah heh? Who? Wait, I have to stop taking Yasmin? But I NEED her! I turn into a zit-face without her, and what the heck am I gonna do with condoms???"

Me: (blinking violently) k-kay.

Dn: So, do you have any other questions?

Me: "Um, I think I got it. But, um, I have to stop taking the pill for two weeks then? Because I'm not actually using it for birth control--it's for hormone/acne stuff."

DN: "Oh, you're not? Then no no no, you can take it. It's just that the antibiotics make it less effective as birth control. But if you're not using it for that then go ahead."

Me: "Okay, good. Because see, I was kind of sad thinking I was going to have to be all zit-faced. Cuz, I mean, I'm already sick."

DN: (laughing in the dear benevolent way he has) "No, no, I would not do that to you."

Then we said goodbye, and when I said thank you I sort of had to stop myself from throwing my arms around him and sobbing.