I think I'll get a job at the Piercing Pagoda

Tonight Jenny & Ed & I went to Sullivan's Steakhouse in Anchorage on a gift card from my parents. The card was technically for Jenny & Ed because they are the favored children but they invited me along. We considered pretending that I was Ed's second wife but decided against it.

The food was good, even if I've probably contracted tapeworms from my filet mignon, which was not so much medium as rawish. It tasted great, but I swear the juice left on the plate started clotting. We also got the the Cajun crabcakes (recommend) as an appetizer with creamed spinach (recommend) and the Lyonnaise potatoes (don't recommend) as sides. Were too full for dessert but because I am a masochist I asked for the menu anyway. Bad idea. My stomach twisted when I read about the Banana Foster Bread Pudding, and when Jenny and I got to the description of the Peanut Butter Pie both our throats closed up and we had to shut the menu quickly. Of course, if we hadn't have been full we probably would have lunged across the dining room and killed people for that pie.

We wandered through the 5th Avenue Mall (the epitome of class) for a little while after dinner. In Nordstrom I coveted the entire table of Dansko shoes. I spotted a very pioneer/polygamist-looking top and almost made Jenny wet her pants when I held it up to me and asked, "Pa, is Mary really going blind?" Making her hobble off to the bathroom all scissor-legged is pretty much my goal in life. Ed threatened to leave because we were embarassing him, all hunched over and wheezing.

Good times, good times.