The post with the nudity

So this morning while I was in the shower, naked, (see? nudity!) I was thinking about that yearly ritual, even the First Full Shave of the Summer. I'm sure there are ladies who will back me up on this, but I just see no point for me to shave above the knee in the winter. First off, I have better things to do in the morning--like blog and eat peanut butter with a spoon. Secondly, I live in a cold place which brings forth the agony that is shaving goosebumps. Oh my word, the goosebumps.

The 4th of July was the first time I got all swimsuited out for the year when Spitfire invited me over to her pool. I gave myself a bit of extra time for The Shaving, but it seriously felt like I was in the shower slaving away for about 45 minutes. And my legs are about half the length of normal women's! It didn't help that my razor was AWOL and my roommates are not very on-the-ball about switching to fresh blades. Someone should speak to them.

I was telling Jen about this on the phone later and she asked me why I don't just do the Full Shave more frequently during the winter because then it wouldn't take so long. At which point I had some sort of hormonal blowout about how there's absolutely no point because no one is going to be seeing them or touching them because I am a dried-up virgin spinster and thanks for rubbing it in! She wisely decided that it was time to go, since the yeti was clearly getting fractious.


Desmama said... [reply]

Even during the dead of winter when I wear pants a lot, I still shave because I can't stand the prickly feeling.

Also? Just found out my friend CityMama1 doesn't have to shave on account of being part Panamanian. Lucky.

kristen said... [reply]

I do the full shave weekly in the winter. I am one hairy chica, and I can't stand the pricklies--talk about itchy.

I once went 4 months w/o shaving anything (last part of my mission). It was winter, freezing, almost no hot water, and thick tights did the trick. It was quite the project when I got home.

You must have fine hair on your legs.

Nemesis said... [reply]

Kristen, I do. It's fine and blond, but there's plenty of it. I bet the Internet is glad to know all about our leg hairs.

Lady Steed said... [reply]

All you say is true. I hate the post winter full shave-it hurts and just imagine how long it must take me nem. I'd be lucky to be done in 45 min!

I do, however, consider myself lucky to have married a man who doesn't really care whether or not my legs or shaved. He's smart enough to know that to make that sort of demand (Hey woman, shave your legs!) would only ensure that he would never get to touch my legs .

Lady Steed said... [reply]

hmmm...I think that was maybe too much information to share with the internet.

Kristeee said... [reply]

Haha - Lady Steed's comment made me giggle for a full 3 minutes! I am also lucky to have such a husband who doesn't care if I'm baby-butt smooth or not, which is fortunate with my hairy beastness.

Enter in my two favorite hair removal methods: laser hair removal and epilating. Epilating is ouchy the first and second times, but really isn't too bad after that because there's just not as much hair. And it stays away for like 3-4 weeks at a time. And it's not as painful (if you take it slowly and over the course of a week or so the first time) on the bikini line as shaving is when you get all those nasty bumps and ingrown hairs and it itches for days on end. Laser hair removal, though expensive, is by far my favorite method though. I've had my upper lip and glabella (between the eyebrows) done and started on my legs. Very nice. Too bad I have to wait 9 months before I can continue the treatments...

BEFore said... [reply]

[laughs nervously and backs out of room]

Nemesis said... [reply]

Hah hah. Sorry, before. And all the rest of the males out there.

I don't know which I would prefer--having to shave my legs and underarms just because it's some cultural expectation, or having to shave my face Every. Single. Day. Although if I did have to shave like a guy, I would be using moisturizer. I can't believe those of you who go without it. Ouch!

Anonymous said... [reply]

EXCEPT that when men go without shaving they are " simply going for a new look.." or " being lazy" BUT when women don't shave we're disgusting. I say give me the first option ANY day... minus that would mean I would be a man, and heaven knows that I don't want that. Great post! :)

Jenny said... [reply]

I have blonde leg hair and more often than not my showers are interrupted by my toddler throwing himself into the tub with me fully clothed so I've gone to church and to the pool a few times with prickly legs but you can't tell unless you get real close to me. One time this woman next to me was staring at them and kind of had this disgusted look on her face. That was the only person who ever mentioned it before.

.::still blinking::. said... [reply]

I shaved my arms before I got married so that I could have the glow of the hairless while in the temple pledging my love for time and all eternity. Dumb. The hairless part, not the wedding part.

I decided the day after the wedding to let them grow back. I was married in December and thought I could cover up the stubble with sweaters until mid-July when it warms up in Logan. At the time I worked in the computer labs at Utah State and this one creepy dude who had a creepy twin came and asked me if I had shaved my arms and was letting them grow back in. He could see the four stubs of hairs peaking out around my wrists.

Confirmation that he was indeed part of the creepy duo.

Dave said... [reply]

Sorry about the whole leg shaving thing. That on top of being a dried-up spinster virgin must be pretty depressing.


Okay- I feel better about not being the one reading Harry Potter seven now.

John Dent said... [reply]

What is this "leg hair" of which you speak? Please tell me more!

Oh I really hope none of the Hot Darcy-esque guys in your county are reading this.

'sposita said... [reply]

My favorite hairy legs story:
Grandma gets into bed with Grandpa on their wedding night. She snuggles close and says, "Hon, you forgot to take off your socks!" He says, "Babe, I did."

The Spozo takes after his Grandpa. I harken more after my Grandma. She often wonders why anyone needs to shave their legs at all.

Jimmy said... [reply]

I've been shaving my face since the days of the straight razor, and am proud to report I have cut my face every single day since then.

An old girlfriend told me she shaved all year round, following along the lines of the "always wear nice clean underwear" mentality, you know, in case she got in an accident.

I sympathize with the post-winter shave, as I usually need a chainsaw for my mug after a 2-day shaving break.

FoxyJ said... [reply]

I thankfully also married a man who doesn't care about the hairiness of my legs, so I rarely do any sort of full shave. I often attend church with prickly lower legs too, and so far no one has noticed. And I just plain refuse to shave my bikini area and buy suits that will cover it up. It's a good thing I live in granola-ville!

chosha said... [reply]

Um, am I really the only woman here who's heard of waxing??? Yes, it hurts (though regular moisturising makes a huge difference to that) but not for long and then you get weeks of glorious smoothness and it isn't stubbly when grows back. Totally worth it.

April said... [reply]

Shaving = Pain in the rear. Well, not the rear. That would be awkward. Let me try again.

Shaving is a pain. I've never tried waxing, as Chosha suggested. Kinda makes me whimper to think of it.

Lady Steed said... [reply]

chosha: I have tried waxing and found it to be as horrible as shaving and even less effective than shaving. Of course I was waxing my own legs, and my hair is plentiful. I am sure if I went to a professional the results would be better. But then, if I'm going to start paying money to have my body hair removed I'm saving up my money till I can afford the laser method.

lilcis said... [reply]

The nice thing about waxing is that after you've been doing it for a while your hair actually starts thinning out. And yes, a professional is much better than doing it yourself.

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