Bit of fast-food culture for you

So I'm at WR's apartment and they've received a bunch of those flyer things from the nearby pizza places and burger places and Chinese places, as do you. I had a pretty good time flipping through and wanted to share some of the menu items with you so that you know what I'm up against in this crazy world.


First we have the burger places, which usually double as kebab shops or as fish & chip shops or pizza shops or maybe friend chicken places or perhaps a bit of all these things.

Beef or Lamb Burger
(Char grilled burger with lettuce, tomato, onion & corn relish)

Pepper and Mayo Burger
(With mayo & lots of freshly ground black pepper)

Garlic and Mayo Burger
(you get the idea)

Lamb Doner Kebab
(Specially minced lamb with herbs and spices)

Kofte Kebab
(Specially minced lamb with parsley, spices & garlic, char grilled on a skewer)

Then we move on to the pizza places, which have possibly my favorite selection. You've got your basic stuff like margherita and pepperoni and hawaiian, and then it all goes to Crazy Land. Do keep in mind that this is from a resteraunt labelled "American Pizza":

Tandoori Chicken
(Tandoori chicken, green chilli, onions, sweetcorn, peppers)

Indiana--Miss Hass, this one's for you since you live in Indiana and probably eat this all the time! Or, you know, possibly this is a play on "India".
(Hot base w/Tandoori chicken, chicken tikka w/green chilli, onions, pineapple, peppers, and sweetcorn)

(Anchovy, prawns, tuna, cockles, sweetcorn, onions & peppers)

American Special--pay close attention to this one, folks
(Ham, garlic sausage, pepperoni, sweetcorn, mushrooms, onions & peppers)

Sweetcorn, for the love of heaven. Can any of you tell me when on this sweet green Earth of goodness we Americans have ever put such a thing as corn on our pizzas? That's right, the answer is NEVER. But they're crazy about sweetcorn over here and put it in everything--pizza, pasta, tuna sandwiches, absolutely everything.

But lest you think I live amongst a pack of crazies who need to be wiped out, let me tell you about the thing they do here that we really need to get behind. It's an appetizer in pretty much every Chinese restaraunt and it is amazing.

Crispy Aromatic Duck
(Deep-fried crispy duck, served with thin pancakes, shaved cucumber, spring onions and hoi sin sauce)

They bring all the ingredients to your table and you make little wraps and eat them while making indecent sounds. I've never seen this on a Chinese menu, but maybe I only live in podunk places and some of our more cosmopolitan friends in NYC or San Francisco have this all the time. Feel free to tell me if that's the case.

So there's Miss Nem's cultural comparison of the day, which is brought to you by the number 6 and the letters E & W.


Savvymom said... [reply]

You spelled a lot of things wrong in that. It's pretty bad when I notice spelling errors. :) Sorry about the food. When you come NEXT WEEK we can eat pizza without corn on it. Promise.

Rachel said... [reply]

This is probably how Italians feel when they hear about what Americans like on their pizza. I still think pineapple on pizza is a sin... And I'm not even Italian! :)

I didn't notice any spelling errors... I'd better go have my spelling chip replaced.

The Walrus said... [reply]

Rachel- Mmmmm chips!

Savvy- I tend to not notice when Americans misspell things, because it's just normal! :P

And sweetcorn is the most amazing thing ever!!!

jaime said... [reply]

Hmmmm...I'm really not so sure about all that food. I suppose there are elements of each that may be pretty good, but give me a plain pepperoni pizza or a regular cheeseburger any day.

I'm so excited to see you soon! Let me know what will work best for you for Coney's. Miss ya!

kristen said... [reply]

Dude--what's up with the sweetcorn? One word for all those menu items: 'EWWW!'

As I was reading those, I was remembering last night's combo meal at Coney's. Ummm....Coney's. Oh yeah, they know how to do a burger. Nem, I was thinking of you because I know how long it's been since you've been there.

The Walrus said... [reply]

Pshaw- it's because we have veg with our burgers and pizzas isn't it? That's why you don't like it!:)

redlaw said... [reply]

I must be hungry because everything on that list sounded yummy...and I didn't notice any spelling errors...but sence win caan i spele?

Nem, are you going to be in Utah while visiting your family? Because a certain Red-head you know lives in SLC and likes to make roadtrips to extravagant locations like Provo, etc. and would be willing to see you, if you have time, of course....

Rachel said... [reply]

I just have two more points to make:

1. Sweetcorn (and any corn except the popping variety) is disgusting.

2. It's the Canadians, Brits, and Australians that spell things wrong. My actual JOB is to go through our American publications and change the spelling to localize it for Canada. Can you believe it?

Oh, and Provo is home to the best chicken Caesar wrap on earth! I guess I had three points. :) Happy new year!!!

Savvymom said... [reply]

Maybe you are just starting to spell things British...

Th. said... [reply]


Sweetcorn was just as ubiquitous in Korea--especially on pizza, sure, but my favorite was corn ice cream packaged in a pastry that looked like an ear. That was lovely.

TannerJ5 said... [reply]

I don't think anything on a pizza is considered exactly wrong, since the greeks started it, and they were weird themselves.

Fraggle said... [reply]

It's the Canadians, Brits, and Australians that spell things wrong.

Them's fightin' words...

edgy killer bunny said... [reply]

Taking into account Th.'s comment, I think Americans are the only ones who DON'T put corn on their pizza. I know the Portuguese do. And, I will add, it is surprisingly good. Also, the Portuguese use real tomatoes instead of that icky tomato paste. It's like eating a real pie. Yumminess.

FoxyJ said... [reply]

Spaniards have a thing for sweet corn as well--I really like it in a nice salad with tuna, tomato, onion, lettuce and a drizzling of olive oil. (They also have scary pizza in Spain, with stuff like squid on it).

Nemesis said... [reply]

SM--I knew there were spelling errors, which is why I did the spellchecker, only it turns out that it didn't fix anything! Stupid Spellchecker.

Thanks Rach--and you're right, I'm sure the Italians think we're freaks.

Um, John? I like you and all, but sweetcorn is SO not the most amazing thing ever--or at least it's not amazing enough to justify its inclusion in ever single cotton-pickin' piece of cuisine offered on this fair island.

Jamz--Yay for Coney's, yay! I'll probably find out once I get there what will work best and when Savvymom will need me. And Kristen, I will Soooo be ordering one of those burgers. And fries.

Redlaw, that would be so much fun! Lemme check with the birth mother (and other family) to see if she'll let me out to play!

Th, that's just nasty. It's a good thing I've been to Sam Hawk's in Provo a few times and now know that there CAN be good Korean food . . .

Tanner, could you please stop making sense?

The same goes for you, EKB. Who's side are you even on??

Hi Fraggle! Please don't kill anyone. And let me say again how nice it was to meet you in person this weekend!

Foxyj, the salad does sound good. And I like corn in general, but when it's on pizza I just start to feel like I'm eating Straight Starch.

Rachel said... [reply]

Fraggle, let's stop the fussin' and the feudin'. My statement was meant to be ironic since there are three groups of people that spell one way and just one group of people who spell differently. Apparently the sarcasm didn't come across in print... :/ Hmmmm... I'll have to work on that.

The Walrus said... [reply]

Miss Nem, we are sooooo fighting! :P

Fraggle said... [reply]

...oh!!!.....and I was looking forward to trying out my new shrink ray too ;)

abby said... [reply]

I learned in London that anything with chicken tikka in it is good. I can understand the British obsession with it. I was happy when I recently found a place that sold chicken tikka sandwiches around here. It is about time. Where's Coney's? I don't recall it from my Provo/SLC days.

Kiki said... [reply]

I'm trying to think of what I wouldn't do to be standing in Paris with Tori Amos' Scarlet's Walk playing through my earbuds and eating a kebab frites right now.

Nemesis said... [reply]

John? Bring it.

Aww, I'm so glad Fraggle and Rachel made up!

Hi Abby! Coney's is on University Parkway, near Deseret Book and the Distribution Center and all that. Soooo good.

Wow, Carrie. I've never tried any of those things (aside from the standing in Paris part) but I'm up for it now!

chosha said... [reply]

In Japan they put mayonnaise on pizza. And seaweed. And...well let me show you: http://www.chachich.com/mdchachi/jpizza.html

So yeah, sweetcorn is sounding pretty normal about now.

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