5.28.2006

Not too much to ask

I've had an epiphany.

For the last little bit I've been thinking about where I would like to go in the fall (other than a tropical island that is owned by me and where only people that I like can come and live). So in my head I've been going over the merits of England and, say, Utah in an attempt to get a logical view of things. What I've come up with, though, is that I want both. No matter which I choose, there would be aspects of the other that I would miss enough to become cranky over it.

My solution, then, is to combine the two, much like the good people who decided that it was too cruel to make me decide between peanut butter and chocolate and so put them together, thereby earning eternal glory.

All I have to do is find a place that has all of these things and I'll be set:

Green English countryside
Public footpaths
Baby lambs
Custard on all desserts
Castles and stately homes
Easy access to Europe
British chocolate
Men with British accents
Big singles wards (the right-thinking kind with older people)
Real Mexican food
Ice cream shops
Wide streets with no parallel parking
Target
Sunshine
Legal permission to work
Gas that costs less than $10 a gallon

Any ideas?

15 comments:

JB said... [reply]

Mmmm...custard...

Nope, sorry. But if you do find a place like that, let us know!

The Walrus said... [reply]

Canada!

Kiki said... [reply]

Louisiana. We don't have British accents, but if you go into Cajun country, those accents are pretty sexy too. However, we do not have large singles wards. New Orleans used to, but something happened down there (I don't know what the current state of the singles ward(s) is (are), and Baton Rouge has a biggish singles ward.

Kiki said... [reply]

Oops. No "are". Just "is".

Lady Steed said... [reply]

I know you want both, but it sounds like most of what you want is in England. *sigh* That states just won't be the same without you.

Cicada said... [reply]

Lady Steed, I counted half and half...

You forgot "Really good friends vs. Horatio Hornblower," I'm afraid.

daltongirl said... [reply]

Epiphi-what?

CBH said... [reply]

I'm with the Walrus, my first thought to answer that was Canada. But when I thought about it, other than access to America and British candy, all they have there are is a hockey obsession and the term "eh?".

Nemesis said... [reply]

Will do, JB. I guess things I could put custard on my desserts in the US. And maybe I could import baby lambs.

Hi Walrus! It's that "permission to work" thing that Canada gets stuck on . . .

Hmmm . . . You know, Carrie, I actually have a grandmother in Baton Rouge. Only I don't know if I'm ready for LA just yet.

Whatever, LS. You're a sweetie for saying it, though!

Oooh, true point, Cici! Only here's the thing. They don't actually HAVE the HH dvds here! The crap is that about??? So I may have to come back for him.

It's okay, Daltongirl. Just take an aspirin and you'll feel better.

CBH, the access to English chocolate is still a really, really big draw though . . .

DanaLee said... [reply]

Green North Carolina with beautiful blue beaches
Public footpaths
Baby cows/hogs/humans
Have you ever seen me bake? You want custard, we have custard!
Castles and stately homes--If you move to Chapel Hill you got it
Easy access to Europe--RDU is an international airport
British chocolate--http://www.southernseason.com/
Men with British accents--I own Pride and Prejudice, you can watch it anytime you want.
Big singles wards (the right-thinking kind with older people)--you'll get over that
Real Mexican food--Ole!
Ice cream shops--Ben and Jerry's on Franklin Street
Wide streets with no parallel parking--parking lots galore
Target--5 minutes from where I live
Sunshine--it's been 80 for weeks now
Legal permission to work--Heck, I'd even write you a letter of reference
Gas that costs less than $10 a gallon--$2.79

You going to love life in the southlands!

E said... [reply]

you should move to Texas, it has everything... not all in the same place, but it has everything you could possibly want

ambrosia ananas said... [reply]

When you find a place having most of the characteristics, I can arrange to have several baby sheep shipped out to you.

DP said... [reply]

Washington, D.C. suburbs. Montgomery, Fairfax, or Howard County. It used to be part of England. There's a weird castle-looking thing in Kensington, too. And footpaths abound.

noelle feather said... [reply]

I was at Target again today....and I did NOT buy a book! I do have some self-restraint! YAY ME! :)

goldilocks said... [reply]

Well, Nem, we're thinking alike on the combining of the best of two worlds here. Come to Boston with me! It's fabulous. We can hit the Newport Mansions of RI. They're incredible. we can pretend like we're descendants of the Astor family and try to take over their incredibly massive palace. As for the custard and accents. We'll hire a hot English butler named "jeeves" and he can make our desserts for us whilst we sit on our balcony and take in the breath-taking sights of our estate. Or, we can just learn to make the custard ourselves and bring back English men. Though, after being in Scotland, the Scottish accents are pretty amazing too.

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