5.21.2008

How to get a nerd to propose

[Scene 1: In the grocery store, after Gentleman Friend laughed at me for staring mesmerized with tilted head at the strange shiny red shorts the girl in front of me was wearing.]

Me: Yeah, I should really work on that. It's kind of like Seth Green said on Buffy. "Just a thought. Poker: not your game."

Fifteen minutes later, in the orange juice section, I asked him a question and he shook himself back to earth.

GF: Sorry. I haven't actually heard anything you said since you quoted Buffy. I've been focusing on not jumping you in the middle of Lee's.


[Scene 2: While driving and listening to the radio.]

Me: This song makes me think about that one episode of Quantum Leap where Al secretly sent Sam to go save his marriage because he's a prisoner of war and his wife's going to get remarried. And then Al gets to dance with his wife that one last time and it's so sad.

Gentleman Friend: Marry me.


[Scene 3: While snuggling in front of the TV.]

GF: So my friend just told me that the girl he's dating passed the Flux Capacitor test.

Me: What's that?

GF: Do you know what the Flux Capacitor is?

Me: Yeah, it's from Back to the Future, right? It's what makes time travel possible.

[pause]

GF: You are hotter right now than you have ever been. If you know what movie that's from and can quote it, then we can go to Vegas right now.

We didn't go, though. Even though I was very flattered.

Bet y'all thought I was fixing to make a Miss Hass-like announcement. Fooled you.

But I am very, very excited for Miss Hass and the lucky Ike. She and I have been friends ever since that fateful first day in the BYU dorms when she burst out of the room next to mine and introduced herself and wondered what the crap was up with my bangs.

29 comments:

cooldad said... [reply]

I. Have no words.

Eva said... [reply]

Does this mean I'm going to die alone because I don't watch/have a TV?

MBC said... [reply]

That was a really good episode of Quantum Leap. I also really like the one where Sam goes back to his own family during the Vietnam War.

Nemesis said... [reply]

Dad, thanks for turning on that episode of Quantum Leap all those years ago. Who even knew THAT was what I needed to get proposed to?

Eva, I don't think so. Because as we know, there are LOTS of different kinds of nerds out there.

MBC, I don't think I've seen that one! I only remember a few of them, like the one where he's pregnant, and where he has to be a pool shark.

daltongirl said... [reply]

Apparently guys get really turned on by girls who know about the Flux Capacitor. The other day we were looking at something, somewhere, I don't remember where or what, and I said, "That looks like a Flux Capacitor." And daltonboy looked at me all incredulous and said, "What?" And I said, "You know. A Flux Capacitor. It's what makes time travel possible." He said, "I KNOW what it is." And then he jumped me.

Nemesis said... [reply]

Bwhahahaha. Seriously, why aren't they telling us stuff like this is Relief Society lessons? This would have actually been helpful information!

Claire said... [reply]

I know this makes me sound like I'm cooing over a new baby, but those stories are so cute! And they makes me happy. Because I absolutely love when good girls find their men (or at least someone who can make them happy for awhile).

Audrey said... [reply]

Funny. I would pretty much jump a guy if he knew what the Flux Capacitor was. Unfortunately I have a record of dating guys who A) only know things about sports, which, ew, or B) are more interested in shopping at the Banana Republic than anything else, which, why the fashion sense didn't tip me off sooner, I have no idea, or C) were born the year Back to the Future was in theaters, which is the danger of being 30 and single in the LDS world.

So basically I am living vicariously through Miss Nem and Miss Hass and while I am THRILLED for you two, I am also feeling very dismayed that these great guys are nowhere to be found in rural Pennsylvania. Somebody, convince your Flux Capacitor-knowledge-having awesome brother to move out here, stat!

Azúcar said... [reply]

I like him more and more.


Would he keel over and die if you said, "So say we all"?

Nemesis said... [reply]

Claire, that is way sweet of you.

Audrey, I am sorry about rural PA. And about the BR boys, who will generally break your heart if given half the chance.

Azucar, I think I'll have to save that one for over the phone. Might be too dangerous, chastity-wise, to try in person.

Marni Tiani Self said... [reply]

What a cute story.

Suzie1 said... [reply]

I thought everybody knew about the flux capacitor? Who knew I was sitting on a secret weapon all these years?

Becky said... [reply]

You need to talk to Jim about Pam. He's having proposal woes, too.

Nerd Goddess said... [reply]

Heh heh, that's funny... and cute, too. :)

I don't think I ever saw my boyfriend so excited as when I told him that I, indeed, watch Star Trek. And enjoy it. (Please don't mock me)

Dave said... [reply]

I like your boyfriend.

One point twentyone jigga-watts!

i i eee said... [reply]

Sounds like love to me.

Although I suggest that you change his name. Whenever I see "GF" I automatically think "girlfriend." In fact, I was slightly confused at first due to my lack of close reading. :)

Saxon said... [reply]

audrey it's a shame your not in the UK we have many male YSA who know what a flux capicitor is and lots more geeky stuff besides. Probably too much geeky stuff for our own good but that's another story.

Nerd goddess your name is well chosen. You have no idea how many geeks here in the UK would kill to hear a girl say that.

Now excuse me while I go and gibber in the corner in shock at the fact there are girls who know the phrase " So say we all" and where it comes from

Miss Hass said... [reply]

You are a cruel, cruel woman. As were your bangs back in the olden days. Oh my, thank heaven for rappelling accidents...

Thanks for the bump in traffic!

BEFore said... [reply]

If he's a computer geek, you can throw in: "The Cake is a Lie".

This was a triumph.

Geeky comicry can be obtained by heading toward XKCD.

Anonymous said... [reply]

does anyone else say, "frack" and mean it?

AmandaStretch said... [reply]

I totally say "Frak"! I once said it to a bunch of high school kids I was teaching dance to, and they all looked shocked before the realized I didn't say anything inappropriate.

But my geek friends appreciate it. :)

Cicada said... [reply]

It was my impression of a Sand Person that made Murray weak in the knees.

April said... [reply]

I once won a boy over by doing an impression of Eddie Vedder (think video of "Jeremy") driving a VW Bug. It was pretty awesome, if I do say so myself.

Nells-Bells said... [reply]

You and C%)$(#& are definitely perfect for each other. Quoting Buffy, Quantum Leap and knowing what the Flux Capicitor is. Sheesh! That pretty much sums up his teen years. Hahahaha! Has he asked you yet if you know Ducktales?

daltongirl said... [reply]

Ooo! Nem! If you don't know Duck Tales by some chance, call me quick. I have the movie and I can teach you the song really fast. Also Rescue Rangers might come in handy, so it won't hurt to be prepared.

Nemesis said... [reply]

Daltongirl, I actually DO know the Ducktales song. Which is how I ended up pregnant.

jane dough said... [reply]

I had a friend who could see the flux capacitor when she closed her eyes.

chosha said... [reply]

Wasn't so much waiting for your announcement as thinking he was sounding more attractive and right-thinking all the time. I fear this may put me in the geek camp.

Katie E. said... [reply]

By the way, this is one of your funniest posts ever, and one of my right-thinking friends totally agrees with me on this point.

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