I believe Goldilocks said it best

When she said, "I close my eyes now and all I see are boobs." I´m sure some of my male readership will already identify strongly with this statement, but it´s a new experience for me.

This will have to be quick, but as my sister reported, I am currently living in a sea of breasts. Just about everyone but Goldilocks and I are topless. All the time, everywhere. People look funny at US for wearing one-piece bathing suits! It´s mostly the middle-aged overweight ladies but there are also some young implant-sporting nymphs as well.

And now I´m out of time at this Internet cafe, but I just wanted to report that, on account of I can´t even believe people were warning me about timeshare salespeople instead of warning me to watch out for flying boobies.

That is all. The rest of Gran Canaria is gorgeous and fabulous and sunny and I´m doing by best to avoid skin cancer, even if it does mean that I will be the same pale slug when I get back that I was when I left.