Apparently the UK is now AGAINST free labor

If you ask me they're taking that post-colonialism guilt a bit too far.

Yesterday I called my local public library to see if they had any volunteer work I could do over the summer. They told me that the county does not currently have a "voluteer scheme" in place. I asked Landlady J what the heck that meant, and she says it's to do with beaurocracy and Health & Safety. Because if they had volunteers in the building then they would be somehow responsible for them even though they're (gasp!) not insured. I don't think it would help if I promised not to sue in the event of a papercut.

I was kind of stunned though, to meet public librarians who aren't begging for volunteers to combat their budget cuts and staffing crises. So I must conclude that there are secret, other reasons why they don't want volunteers at the library.

Ahem. Here's what they probably think:

  • I'm an addict who will run a drug ring during storytime.
  • I'm secretly homeless and plan to sleep in the stacks.
  • I might corrupt the patrons with my Yankee ways.
  • I plan to steal copies of Barbara Cartland novels. Only I could so write that crap myself. I would just have to make sure that the heroine is always breathless, tremulous, and uses a lot of ". . ."s when she talks.
  • I am offering to do something for free, so I should not be trusted. But hey, if they want to pay me they are more than welcome to.

Only here's the kicker, people. Turns out there is one thing you can do for the public library. You can be part of the program that delivers books to people who can't come to the library. So, if I've got this right, they won't let me shelve books under supervision, but they'll gladly send me into the homes of elderly and disabled and house-bound people who can't even defend themselves if I should turn out to be a burglar or killer or similar.

Nice one.

After that I contact my university library to see if they need free labor. They don't know if there's anything they can do, but one of the administrators has invited me to come chat with him on Thursday. So cross your fingers for me!

ps. Ebay just emailed to say that someone else bought my dress. Way to rub my nose in it there, Buttface Ebay.


The Walrus said... [reply]

I've never had the pleasure of purchasing stuff off buttface- they just don't look good to me.
And yes, the "no volunteers" or "treating volunteers like s***" trend seems to be happening quite a bit. Look at Oxfam.

CoolMom said... [reply]

Sounds like you are barking up the wrong hedgerow. They don't exactly have the vounteer mentality over there. They have the "tax you for everything coming and going mentality" and lets keep it that way.

DanaLee said... [reply]

What about public/private schools if the university option doesn't work out? I have never seen a school turn away a volunteer, particulary one with sexy eyes.

amyjane said... [reply]

Tell you what--fly over here and you can volunteer at my house. We have a great program you can sign up to help with. It's called sick baby-working mommy-recovering husband slave labor. Interested?

kristen said... [reply]

That's a socialist country for you. You know why those rules come about right? Some moron probably sued for some frivolous injury most likely caused by his idiot self.

All the more reason to come back to the states......that and I miss you : )

Beckyww2006 said... [reply]

Hello Ms. Nemesis: Just wanted to send you a sweet, sweet hit from St. Petersburg! We got our girl today....well, we got the paperwork saying we get our girl. Please check us out: www.woodworthfamily.blogdrive.com God is good! Becky

goldilocks said... [reply]

nooooo, you didn't get the dress!! boo, rubbish, filth, boo! i agree, ebay=buttface

Queen Zippergut said... [reply]

I'm catching up on your old blogs and am laughing out loud! Hil-Arious!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...