I knew there was a reason for moving to the UK

Pirates of the Caribbean 2 opens today here, and my American friends and family have to wait till tomorrow. Suckahs!!!! I'm going out for Chinese food tonight and then to see the film. Am ever so excited to get me some pirate boyfriend action--I've always had a weakness for the nautical type.

BF #1: Captain Jack Sparrow, who, I don't even care who knows it, is looking so good to me right now. I realize that there would be obstacles to our relationship--things like bad hygiene and dubious morals and STDs, but still. I just--yeah. And if I can't have a fling with him, then I think Elizabeth Swann should. Because he's funnier than Will. And he would at least make a move instead of standing around all earnest-like. Only she should really make him brush those teeth before he kisses her. I'm just saying. I tried a chocolate bar flavored with rum the other day and it was nas-ty.

And while she's off doing that, I can be comforting BF#2, even Will Turner. Will, sweetie, you just keep standing there and looking pretty. Play up those strengths!

I couldn't get the picture to show up, but just wait till you see who turned pirate and suddenly became hot! Very much in need of a bath, but hot just the same! I knew he had it in him . . .

Tonight will be a cornucopia of delights, friends.


abby said... [reply]

I'm insanely jealous of you. Jack Sparrow is by far the hottest man on the seven seas. How could Elizabeth not give into someone as snarky as him? She could have totally kissed him on that island. I still shake my head at that.

Brad said... [reply]

I'm going to the premiere tonight in Hollywood and am leaving Angelina at home with the kids.

I heard KN looked good though. She's kind of like me "one of those people you hate because of genetics. It is the truth."

The McCulloch Family said... [reply]

LUCKY!!! I AM SOO JEALOUS! I love the post.

kristen said... [reply]

You're going to have to fight me for Will Turner, girl, he's mine. I just watched Pirates #1 last night, and oh man.......He can die for me any day.

Have fun tonight and be sure to give us a movie review:)

Th. said... [reply]


I think, for Halloween, I will paint eyeballs on my eyelids.

Desmama said... [reply]


That's all.

daltongirl said... [reply]

I am very happy for Jack Davenport. He was always a little jealous of Johnny and Orlando for getting to be so cool. And now look at him! Whoa. Elizabeth definitely has some soul searching to do now.

Have tickets for tomorrow afternoon. Can't wait!

TannerJ5 said... [reply]

very sneaky...everything comes out first in britian.stink you.(sorry, for hanging up yesterday, the car moved too fast)

chosha said... [reply]

I'm seeing it this weekend and I CAN'T WAIT!!! Especially now that my pirate boy flatmate has moved out.
Have you heard the news about Keith Richards playing Jack Sparrow's daddy in PoTC3? Genius move after Johnny so diligently basing the character on that dubious rocker.

Stupidramblings said... [reply]

Happily I am not hearing you talking about Dr. "House." When that discussion started I started wondering what you women see in men...

noelle feather said... [reply]

I have a button, on my backpack, that reads:

"I Love Jack Sparrow"

And, oh how I do!

The Craner Family said... [reply]

Can't wait to see it! You are so lucky!

The McCulloch Family said... [reply]

Desmama, did you just go see the Devil Wears Prada? Meryl Streep says 'that's all' a million times in that movie.

Desmama said... [reply]
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Desmama said... [reply]

No, I haven't seen it. Don't really have any plans to, either. Meryl and I, though, are probably blood sisters or something, so that's why my subconscious told me to write it.

CoolMom said... [reply]

I'm with Stupid, I sorta tried to get into Dr. House until Coolgranpa started watching and identifying with him. Coolgranpa's other hero is Jack (the mean prosecutor that hates to lose and thinks he's always right too) from Law & Order. Sorry.

Queen Zippergut said... [reply]

You are just oh, so hilarious! Loved the post. The kids want to see it tonight for FHE. That oughta be fun. "I need to wee!" in the middle of the best parts...

And where are you? You need to come over. England just isn't that big. Really. It isn't. You know the Thteeds, I know the Thteeds. That's enough to connect us.

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