Hips don't lie

So my sister, because she is a dirty bigmouth, may have possibly outed me and my recent listening habits.

First off, I don't have a radio. I don't have an iPod. I've never even had a CD player in my car. That's how out of the loop I am with the popular music. I just barely figured out that you can watch music videos on YouTube. I'd been using it to watch clips of my boyfriend John Krasinski on The Office and cry over the love we share.

But it turns out that when I'm tired I need to be listening to something upbeat to keep me from falling asleep or zoning out in front of the computer. So I found a London top 40s website to listen to.

So here are the songs that keep me awake and shaking my booty in my chair.

(Note: If you choose to seek out any of these songs do not even think of holding me responsible for any subsequent corruption. I have my own soul to think about.)

Hips Don't Lie, Shakira (currently the #1 single in the UK)
I'm Not Here for your Entertainment, Pink
Ain't No other Man, Christina Aguilera
Stars are Blind, by PARIS flipping HILTON. Oh. I feel shame.
I don't Feel Like Dancing, Scissor Sisters
London Bridge, Fergie the Trashqueen (the radio version, not the CD version with all the swearing)
Mymymy, Armand Van Helden
Sexy Back, Justin Timberlake. I had no idea that's who that was.
Suddenly I See, KT Tunstall

These are the ones I wish I wasn't hearing:
Smile by Lily Allen, whose accent makes me want to jam a skewer in my ear.
Unfaithful by Rihanna, who I want to beat with a chair for being such a nasty ho. Cicada says this song hasn't made it to Utah yet. Utah is lucky.

And then there are other songs that make me go "GAH!!!" and shut the browser.

Yep. I don't shower or brush my teeth anymore or leave my house, but I am quite possibly the trendiest I'll ever be.


noelle feather said... [reply]

Color me out of the loop too....what is YouTube?

word verification: easiest.ever.


Anonymous said... [reply]

I as SO ashamed. You are dead to me...

Kelly said... [reply]

HATE the Rihanna song. Not only is she a skanky ho, but she's singing all about it in a nasally whiny voice.

LOVE SexyBack.

Have you heard "Black Horse and the Cherry Tree" by KT Tunstall? Awesome!

CoolMom said... [reply]

The thought crossed my mind to let you use coolboy's iPod while he's off in other parts, but then, I was supposed to be using it. But he never showed me how. I know the last couple of days before he left he was frantically downloading stuff.

I've actually heard of most of those people on your list. Who's the sad girl who sings that "Promiscuous Girl" song. I saw her on Today show a while back. Talk about trash!

CoolMom said... [reply]

Kelly, I almost mentioned that song. We even have it in Alaska.

Nemesis said... [reply]

Um, Mom? Where are you hearing these songs? Is this the kind of stuff you listen to? And yeah, they've got the "Promiscuous Girl" song here too.

I think it would be great if that thought about Coolboy's iPod could take up residence in your mind. Because I would take very good care of it while he's gone!

kristen said... [reply]

Interesting choice of songs. We have that Rihanna song here (or maybe it's just on my satellite radio). I always switch the channel quickly--that song makes me want to throw myself off a cliff.

The promiscuous girl song I believe is by Michelle Branch. Yeah, she went total ho on us.

You should see the videos on some of these songs. Talk about skanks!! I won't even start on the Pussycat dolls.....

noelle feather said... [reply]

when I hear the word skank, I immediately turn to: Jessica Simpson. Period.

JB said... [reply]

Unfaithful by Rihanna, who I want to beat with a chair for being such a nasty ho. Cicada says this song hasn't made it to Utah yet. Utah is lucky.

I hate that song, too. With a passion. I mean, if you're unfaithful and you're sad that it's hurting your boyfriend's feelings but you don't want to stop being unfaithful, do the decent thing and break up with him for crying out loud! Or just don't cheat to begin with. I think those two need a DTR.

Actually, I first heard it in Utah at least two and a half months ago, so I know it's gotten there. Maybe Cicada and I just listen to different stations... :shrug:

metamorphose said... [reply]

Promiscuious Girl is not Michelle Branch. It's Nelly Furtado.

Justin Timberlake's entire new album is sexy hot!

Don't listen to Paris! Boo!

Also, it's all about the Scissor Sisters, baby! Love them!

amyjane said... [reply]

Yeah...I have no idea who any of these people/songs are. Me and my Curious George soundtrack are going off to be dorks together...

Anonymous said... [reply]

Dead to me I tell you. Dead. Dead. Dead!

The McCulloch Family said... [reply]

Dad if she's so dead to you why do you keep posting on the blog?

I saw the pussycat dolls on Ellen and THOSE girls are the biggest Hos ever. And a couple of them look pretty old. Way too old be running around nekkid anyway.

banana said... [reply]

Um... not sure about Pink's song - have a closer listen to the words. She won't entertain him so sends him off to use his hand to entertain himself instead. Enough said!

The tune is good though! :-)

CoolMom said... [reply]

Whoever she is I saw her singing with some black guy who was at least 2-3 times her age and they were...........nevermind.........onstage together. I told you, it was the Today show a couple of months ago. It's what's on at the gym.

I think that Black Horse and the Cheery Tree song is from NPR. Your dad claims that channel is the cause of some recent changes in my voting habits. No so.

daltongirl said... [reply]

amyj--yay!! I love you! Curious George rocks. Also, my sister knows Jack Johnson. So what do I need to know about any of those other people?

Lola had to fill out a questionnaire for one of her classes, and she wrote her four favorite groups. I had never heard of ONE of them. That made me feel like a bad mother. And then it made me feel like saying, "Kids these days, with their rock and roll music. Bah!" as I gum my food and rock in my special chair.

chosha said... [reply]

While I hate on principle any song where the lyrics talk about infidelity and the concept of not stopping it (sad about it or not), I'd much rather beat Paris Hilton over the head with a chair. I've seen Rhianna in interviews and thought she was sweet. Interviews with Paris make me want to tear something in half. The fact that there are so many young girls trying to look, dress and act like her makes me want to give in to despair.

chosha said... [reply]

Speaking of youtube, best youtube video I've seen all year: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dMH0bHeiRNg

Scully said... [reply]

Nemisis, you get a pass onthe Stars are Blind, simply because the first time I heard it I thought it was Gwen Stefani. Because that is definitely NOT Paris Hilton's natural voice.

Ditton on the Rhianna song. Also, she did that song that sampled Soft Cell's tainted love and once you hear it, you can't get either song out of your head.

And finally, we can be friends forever because my love for John Krasinski is verging on obsession, and lots of people just don't understand. Also, he looked smashing at the Emmys, see if they have some footage on YouTube.

Scully said... [reply]

Oh, and Justin Timberlake deserves a chair to the shin because he compared himself to David freaking Bowie, which, no.

Cicada said... [reply]

Thanks for quoting me to the internet saying that the song hasn't hit Utah... I must say though that for the past month or so I have been listening to a lot of radio and I certainly haven't heard that song. But I probably am listening to the wrong stations.

Jér said... [reply]

Gotta love those Scissor Sisters. I just wish they were more popular in the U.S.

JB said... [reply]

I love Rihanna now, but still hate that song. Yech.

And the P!nk song is "U + Ur Hand" actually, though your version of her title is much less suggestive. Great video, if you're interested. Which you can find here along with her newest song/video, which is hilarious.

JB said... [reply]

(Also, U + Ur Hand is still an awesome song, if a bit suggestive. She makes some excellent points and basically just says "Leave me alone. You're on your own for entertainment *tonight*!")

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